Moved again

Okay, folks, this is my last move. This will be my home blog from now on: http://gracetuesday.wordpress.com. No, really, I mean it. I prefer wordpress to blogger, and I have always liked this nym to go along with the "Tuesday's child is full of grace" idea, so I've finally settled on a forever blog. If I ever feel I need more freedom to change things on it, I'll pay the extra to have that advantage rather than get yet another domain name. I will no longer post anything on the blog with my real name. I'll be changing it to become a main page for my educational and art stuff.

So here's my latest post of pics from my new job. http://gracetuesday.wordpress.com/2011/08/13/more-work-pics

Where I work

I'm training with the tax clerks. Although I won't be the content expert, it makes sense that I know their jobs since I'll be putting their training online. But I'm soooooo ready to start learning my own job and not theirs. I want to sit at my own desk and start getting to know the people I'll work with. But I have to do this for a couple of weeks or so. Next week I go to a branch office to shadow them as they begin to work with the public to do vehicle registration. Sigh.

On the upside, I'm on the side of the building that has a view of the bay and my desk area is quite large, not that I've had a chance to sit there yet. And everyone there has been very nice. There's a good atmosphere there. I was given a tour of all the different departments that are part of the tax office.

I don't mean to bore you, but this new job is on my mind at the moment. I took some pics today after work so my family could see where I work. I'm on the 14th floor.

The approach to the building from where I park just a couple of blocks away. It's the tall one on the right.

Boundaries

Mine tend to be rather flexible depending upon circumstances and mood. I put up with a lot, actually, even if it crosses my comfort zone, but every now and again I enforce my boundaries. One of them is that the blog I have that's attached to my real name where possible customers, employers, etc. can find me, is where I only show what I want to show, and that includes in the comments. I don't want to have my comments there laced with insult toward other commenters. Since some of my friends can't help themselves, if you want to have it out over here, you're welcome. But not there. That's a boundary I will enforce. So I've posted a comment policy over there.

Even though I may hide some things from the public over there, I want to be able to post serious and heartfelt topics that I don't feel the need to keep my name out of, as well. And I don't mind strong discussion, even if I am a bit thin-skinned at times. But on that blog, if the comments turn insulting, I will take the insulting parts out, though I'll try to leave as much of the comment intact as possible.

Video calling

Dick was talking about Skype on his blog, and rather than write a book in his comments I figured I'd make my response a blog post of my own on the subject of Skype, or video calling in general.

I don't Skype. I have on rare occasions. My mom wishes I would. It's funny how I, a person who loves all things internet connectable and who plays around trying this, that, and the other, including Skype, doesn't Skype. Video calling requires letting people see you when you don't feel like being seen, or sitting in one place when you want to do other things while talking. When I talk on the phone, I can do dishes, dust, sweep, whatever. Or if I do audio chat on the computer I'm still free to do other things without the other person feeling like I'm not paying attention, which can happen if you keep grading papers while Skyping. Even when I sit here for long stretches on the computer and text chat, I can go back and forth easily between screens, watching videos, reading articles, or listening to songs, and not have to answer immediately.

So, I don't Skype. Maybe, when we have homes with monitors and cameras in every room, I might one day do video calling. Maybe. But I'd still have to be in the mood to be seen, which, when I'm at home, isn't often unless I'm expecting a visit from you-and I do love to have people visit.

The long and the short of it is, I'll make time to sit and talk to you in person, but to do it over Skype makes me uncomfortable or feel unproductive. Isn't that silly?

Adventures

So after waking at noon (I know, right? but I had one of those sleepless nights and didn't get to bed 'til 4am) and taking 2 hours to wake up (made lunch & ate, did dishes, swept living room, and scanned and saved some images for my French study group lesson-those are waking up tasks), I debated whether or not I wanted to do yoga or go for a bike ride. I decided on the bike ride because I need more vigorous activity in my life. Besides, I didn't feel like spending the afternoon in my studio doing my French. Sitting in McDonald's after a 40 minute ride was more appealing. I needed to get out.

So I packed up my French book and the netbook, and because it looked like rain, put the totebag in a plastic garbage bag for protection. Then I filled my travel cup with ice water, put the bag in my handlebar basket, and took off.

I don't have a bike built for speed, it's made for comfort. Or would be if I could get one of those wide comfy seats that fits both the bike and my leg length. I have to make do with the seat it came with and a gel cover. It works, but I want one of those wider seats instead, but they sit too far forward, and so my legs are awkward when I pedal. I got handlebars that allow me to ride upright instead of hunched over.

It was quite humid, but with enough cloud cover not to be uncomfortable. My energy level is under a handicap this month, though. It's been one of those double cycle months. Bleh. So about 2/3s of the way I began to feel quite drained. It took me longer than usual to get to McDonald's, almost an hour, and I was shaky as I got off the bike and locked it up. It took me an hour and a half to recover and feel up to riding back home, plenty of time for me to translate a huge chunk of French.

Just as I took off down the road it started raining big fat drops of water. It was awesome! It felt refreshing, and I couldn't keep the huge smile from my face as I rode. The frogs were just as overjoyed, and itty bitty ones frolicked across my path. Thankfully, none of them jumped into harm's way because I don't think I would have had the coordination to avoid them. Once again, I began to poop out, this time about half way, and though 20 min. of riding in the rain was an adventure, 40 min. was enough of a good thing. When I reached the street that led to the entrance of my subdivision I was walking. Thank goodness that walking isn't nearly so draining as carrying one's weight on a bicycle up a hill (a gentle one, but still). When I got home, though I wasn't cold, the warm shower I took felt good. I'm still feeling my legs right now.

The only bad thing about my adventure was when the lightning started. I'm very uncomfortable being out when it's lightning. I had to keep talking to myself, saying things like, "Okay, since you're thinking the worst, you know it won't happen. You're going to make it home without incident. And look, even if you get struck, it'll be so fast you won't know a thing." Silly stuff like that. I really, really hate lightning, even while thinking it quite splendid in its awfulness.

So, I've managed to bring my eating under my control, as well as my hormones (at least to the extent that I no longer experience those dreadful black days), and even on my downer days I don't often succumb to counter-productive behavior the way I used to. I think I am now ready to become more serious with the physical stuff. I'm not promising myself anything, but this seems to be the way I work. I start, I fail, I start again, until I'm not failing. Now that I'm at a comfortable place with food and supplements, it's a good time to add in more physical activity. I have a good yoga routine that I enjoy and would like to make more regular, and I love bike riding. And 3 more pounds will see me in that dress that I've been waiting to fit into, and dance floor here I come! I think that'll do for the next phase. Who knows? Maybe a year from now you might even find me at the gym. Bwahahahahaha!

She begins to burn

Oh, yeah.

We left off here:

And now we're here:

One more day of painting and she'll be finished.

I got the job!

You know that already, of course. I shouted it all over FB and G+. I really am happy about it. Yes, I've worried about how it will affect my painting, if I'm going to end up exhausted and miserable doing the 9 to 5 thing again, or if it will impact my new habits in a negative way. But you know what? It won't. I won't. It won't. I'm not the same person I was a year and a half ago. My approach to my life has undergone a metamorphosis that can't be undone. I've discovered things that really work for me, and I know what the cost is if I were to lose them, and I simply cannot do that. I will quite literally die a slow death if I do, and I can't face that. I've come too far, gained too much good, to let anything get in the way of that, even a job. Especially a job.

This job is the result of my search for a way to make my life fit who I am along with the responsibilities that I have. Though it looked for awhile as though I'd made yet another poor decision, I didn't. I love creating multimedia for the computer. I love education. And I had an absolute blast putting together my presentation. I KNOW this is the right sort of job for me. I do need some structure, and I also need some peace of mind. I need to know that I have a regular paycheck and that I can visit a doctor. I need to know that my daughter's needs will be met. So my next task, now that I know the things that are essential to my sanity, is to find ways to incorporate them into what will become a busier life. And I'm up for that. I'm ready for that. It's like a new adventure, and I long for a bit of adventure right now.

And this is also going to make my dream of Paris come true. I will be able to save up the money and the time and go at last! And once I've achieved that dream, I will create a new one. :-) And meanwhile, I will continue to make time to paint, to meditate, and to learn French.

Yay!

Is that what's wrong with me?

I was reading one of the daily inspirational emails that I get and something in it struck me, and I asked myself that question. Then suddenly I realized what I'd asked. Is that what's wrong with me? I've dealt with this before, thinking that something is wrong with me instead of accepting there's nothing wrong, this is who I am, and what I really need to do is love all of myself. That isn't to say there aren't things about myself that could use some tweaking, but that's a matter of using what I like about myself, what I know I can do, to shine over the things that can be counter-productive. The point is, I have to practice treating myself gently, more lover-like, not beat myself up over every little thing, not consider that I'm malformed in some way.